I wonder sometimes
how things would be different had I
kissed you then.
Would we be walking |hand|in|hand|
through the park?
Would we be making memories right now?
I'll never know,
because they were right;
I do regret it.
I wish, now that I had kissed you
when you gave me the chance,
so I wouldn't be sitting here thinking how it'd be different.
When I look at you, when I'm with you,
I'm happy...
an emotion hard to come by these days.
Every time we hang out,
I think about how I ruined our friendship then.
Once something is |b|r|o|k|e|n|, it can never be completely f-i-x-e-d.
But I don't think you do.
You said your part: "Let's leave this behind us."
I said mine: "We can be friends again."
I've said many lies in my day,
that being one of them.
But you'll never know that, [will you?]
You'll live your life not knowing
just how much you meant to me...
just how much I wish I meant to you...
You think that when you told me, "I never liked you like that,"
everything was o.v.e.r.
Maybe it was just the beginning.
Even still, a year after all this began,
I won't let those tears fall...
In hopes, perhaps,
that someday,
you would hold me in your arms
and say, "I'm sorry; it's okay to cry."
You won't though, will you?
I hate myself for falling into this forgotten trap of yours:
your smile, your voice, you're laugh...
I -struggle- and {struggle} and |s|t|r|u|g|g|l|e|
but maybe that just leaves me more trapped.
I cannot set myself free.
Echos of the past -pierce- my throbbing heart...
for the thread of life, once sewn,
cannot be -u-n-d-o-n-e-
And I will forever be [trapped]
in the memories of what could have been.
A wandering soul.
There is n.o.t.h.i.n.g
beyond the black numbing
of this hole I dug for myself.
Yay semicolons! They're getting rare these days...good to see them getting some love.